THE DENVER CATFISH FESTIVAL

Hang in there, Baby! Only one more night until the Seventh Annual Denver Catfish Festival!

Greetings, Fellow Catfish Enthusiasts,

The Catfish have been mercilessly slaughtered and shipped northwestward from the Great State of Louisiana; the festival grounds are prepped and ready for this evening’s set-up.

Surprisingly self-conscious yet wildly creative festivalgoers have submitted haikus of every ilk; gallons of peanut oil wait silently in anticipation.

Corn meal of yellow and white adorn stainless steel bowls, greeting eggs, milk, flour, and spices as hush puppy batter takes form.

It must be Catfish Festival Eve.

There are a few last-minute notes that everybody should be aware of:

1. The Haiku Competition is open until 3 PM tomorrow, but try to get them in before 3PM today!  The judges need time to digest your literary delicacies.

2. With the mild weather we’re expecting tomorrow (instead of the usual late summer blast furnace that we usually get), we’re swapping out misting tents and kiddie pools for bouncy castles. We have two so far and might be able to get our hands on a couple more. Lamentably, the bouncy castles are for children only, unless you need a nap.

2. Just a reminder that we’re at a new location this year, 3156 Geneva Street, 80238, in Stapleton. Please don’t bother the people at our old house. We hear they have shotguns and are anxious to use them.

3. Festival staff and crew need to be at the festival grounds this evening at 5:00 PM MT for orientation and set-up. Be sure to bring your chemical suit, branding iron, and a fresh, or at the very least a functional, liver.

Additionally,

Even though the spirit of our event is most definitely a positive one, Catfish Festival Eve can be a very trying time for adults and children alike as rational thought gives way to sleepless, euphoric confusion.

For adults, we suggest a large, bready meal for lunch (wonder bread mayonnaise sandwiches come to mind) and generous amounts of alcohol for dinner.  Don’t worry about the potential hangover; fried food and sunshine are excellent cures!

For the parents, try this trick to keep the nippers from getting too excited:

Tie a bag of Tootsie Pops to the back of your ATV and drive around the block 24 to 30 times with your offspring chasing feverishly.  This should insure a deep, soothing night’s sleep and slightly less active legs for tomorrow.

We hope you have a wonderful Catfish Festival Eve, and we will see you tomorrow at the SEVENTH ANNUAL DENVER CATFISH FESTIVAL!